New post series: Only @ work

Gal and I work at the same medical facility and we see/hear/are exposed to a wide variety of people.  Without violating HIPPA, I'll try to occationally shed light on some of the more interesting encounters with people who are (purportedly) members of H. sapiens.

Take today for example:

A phone call comes in to the lab from an outside caller.

Guy: Lab, this is Guy.

Female Caller: *screaming children in background* Hey, I had a question about this report my doctor got back from my wound culture.

G: Ok.

C: It says I have intercockey in a cut on my foot.

G: ...say that again.

C: Intercockey

G: ...spell that for me.

C: I n t e r o c o c c i.

G: Do you mean Enterococci?*

C: Yea, that's it.  What is that?

G: It's a bacteria.

C: Where would I have gotten that?

G: I was wondering that myself.  Well, it's usually in people's intestines.

C: So I would have to have come into contact with...feces to get it?

G: Maybe.

C: So, could I have gotten it from sexual intercourse or anything like that?

G: Oh, God, no, NO! No more mental images**!! Ummm, that's a question for your doctor. Much like the entirety of this conversation.

C: Oh, ok. Well, thanks!

And there you have it folks, a new series of posts exemplified.

-Guy

*I studied this particular bug for a senior project. And, yea, the usuall way people came into contact with this critter was through feces.  It just wasn't my place to go there with this patient.
**Modern science needs to invent some sort of memory-scrubbing medicine for moments like this.  I get the feeling the primary ingredient would be full-strength bleach.